A friend’s abortion story encouraged her to choose life for her son during an unplanned pregnancy. She now works as a faith-based doula to support moms as they welcome a new life into the world.
23-year-old Kasey had just graduated from college and was set to travel to Costa Rica as a Peace Corps English teacher in 2020 when she found out she was unexpectedly pregnant.
“That was really my dream. I love to travel. I love different cultures, so I was really excited about that,” Kasey recalls. “Come to find out everything that happened in 2020, I would not have been going anyway.”
Kasey’s unplanned pregnancy happened during an inconvenient time. Her post-graduation plans were wrecked, and she didn’t know what to do.
“This was an unexpected pregnancy, and I did not really know if I ever wanted to be a mom. I thought that maybe I would be one day, kind of just like maybe later this would happen,” Kasey says.
‘IF I HAVE ONE PERSON IN MY CORNER, I CAN DO THIS’
Kasey’s unplanned pregnancy story was featured on Live Action’s Instagram. Her story was also picked up by other pro-life groups, including March for Life and EveryLife.
Kasey attended a liberal university, so most of the people around her were pro-choice. They supported her decision to keep her baby, but she felt discouraged about the message she received about having an unplanned pregnancy.
“There was just a lot of negativity around me, and I was already in such a vulnerable place,” Kasey says.
People presented abortion to her as a simple solution to a “mistake.” Kasey wrestled with her choice for weeks but couldn’t bring herself to choose abortion.
Kasey says, “They were saying things like, ‘It’s OK if you get an abortion. We’ll still love you. You’re so young. You have time. It’s just a mistake that you can write off and just try again one day.’ I even had one person say to me, ‘Well, you and this guy just started a relationship. You don’t want to start off on the wrong foot. Maybe just get an abortion, and then you guys work on your relationship.’ My doctor called me saying, ‘You just take the pill. I can write the prescription, and that’s all you have to do.’”
There were so many negative voices around Kasey, but one friend’s story gave her the encouragement she needed to continue to choose life for her son. Her friend had an abortion in 2018, and it became her friend’s mission to share her story to help other moms not experience the same pain she felt.
Her friend said, “Kasey, do not do this. I live with the regret. Every day I think about my baby, and every month I have PTSD when my period comes because it makes me think about the abortion that I had.”
Those words stuck with Kasey.
“I was like, ‘If I have one person in my corner, I can do this.’ I just continued on with my pregnancy, and now looking back, it was the best decision I’ve ever made,” Kasey says.
Kasey’s 3-year-old son, Jude.
Despite the discouragement around her, Kasey stood her ground in choosing life for her child. She remembers hearing her son’s heartbeat and acknowledged the truth that she was a mom and that there was a life inside her. Not once did Kasey see her son as a “mistake.”
“I cannot do this, like this is murder — that’s all I could think about,” Kasey says.
Her son, Jude, is now 3 years old. Kasey named her child “Jude” after The Beatles’ song “Hey, Jude.” She couldn’t stop singing the song the summer she found out she was pregnant. Kasey later discovered the Book of Jude in the Bible and learned that Jude means “praised or servant of Christ.”
“I pray that over him, and I speak that over him. I believe it for him that God has a plan for him, and he will be like a servant of Jesus,” Kasey says.
‘IT’S OK TO NEED HELP’
Facing an unplanned pregnancy alone was the hardest season of Kasey’s life. She was unemployed since she lost her waitressing job in college due to the COVID-19 pandemic. She survived by using unemployment benefits and resumed waitressing a few months after finding out about her pregnancy.
Kasey found it difficult to work because she was constantly on her feet, but she persevered because she had to make ends meet. She experienced a lot of shame during that time in her life.
“It’s OK to need help. Moms need help, too. Utilize the resources that you have to help you get back on your feet. It’s what I did, and that’s what got us through,” Kasey says.
Kasey got paid $12 an hour. She remembers the worry she felt whenever she received her paycheck. Kasey wasn’t sure if she would be able to provide for herself and her baby, but she did her best to save any money she could. She was then able to transition to a corporate position that would help her financially.
“It was a lonely season. I was the first friend from my friend group to become a mom. My college friends had just moved across the country and were living their dream jobs, and I was stuck back in my hometown pregnant. I just felt really lost and alone, but I prayed for friends. God brought me community slowly. But surely He restored everything,” Kasey recalls.
After Jude was born in January 2021, Kasey started attending a local church where she received a lot of support and encouragement.
“It has been amazing and just been so beneficial to have people around me who see my potential. They don’t just see me as a single mom but as a child of God first,” Kasey says.
FAITH-BASED DOULA
Kasey has been serving moms as a doula since summer of 2023.
Kasey’s unplanned pregnancy led her to a different career path. Despite graduating with a degree in investigative journalism and working in a corporate position, she decided to start her own business as a faith-based doula.
This passion blossomed from her birthing experience. Kasey received so much comfort and support from a nurse, who used to work as a doula. She wanted to give other moms that same type of support so they feel encouraged and empowered during labor.
Kasey prayed and waited for the Lord to open the door for her to become a doula. She left her corporate job and started the certification process to become a doula in June 2023. Kasey launched her business afterward and works as a doula full time.
“When you’re operating in your calling, there’s just so much more purpose in that,” Kasey says. “The best part is being in spaces that normally I wouldn’t be in and bring and practice the Word of God there — praying over my moms, reading affirmations based on Scripture, encouraging them, and seeing them thrive.”
Motherhood has become a big part of Kasey’s identity and has not only helped her care for moms as a doula, but has motivated her to become the best person she can be.
“It’s impacted me in the best way. It’s caused me to become more loving, more selfless, more thoughtful, more empathetic towards moms and their little kids,” Kasey says.
‘THINGS CAN CHANGE, AND THEY WILL CHANGE’
Before her son turned 2, Kasey met her fiance, Domenic, at church. He understood the single motherhood season she had gone through and was willing to be a father to Kasey’s son. They dated for eight months before he proposed, and they are set to be married in June 2024.
“Domenic’s mom had actually chosen life for him when she became pregnant in college, so he already had a heart and understanding for me,” Kasey says.
When Kasey chose life for Jude, she didn’t know how that choice would affect her life. She didn’t know that her unplanned pregnancy would lead her to a new career and that she’d find a man who would love both her and her son.
“Fear is a liar. Don’t make a permanent decision based on your circumstances because in a year things will change no matter what. Look back on your life a year ago, things have changed from then to now. A lot of moms are like, ‘We don’t have the money right now. I don’t have the resources right now. I’m not prepared right now.’ But that’s right now — things can change, and they will change. God is not going to leave his children hanging. He’s going to provide,” Kasey says.
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