Emily and her boyfriend chose life during an unplanned teen pregnancy and have now been together for 23 years. Their son was the best man during their wedding.

June of 2000 was a month that changed the course of 16-year-old Emily Burkhart’s life. She was heading into her sophomore year of high school when an unplanned pregnancy turned her into a teen mom.

Emily’s boyfriend, Craig, just graduated from high school, all set to attend college in the fall. They were both terrified and worried about their future. 

“I’ll be honest. We did think about abortion, obviously when you’re at that age. You wonder, what can we do? What are all of our options? Before we knew what support we had though, we did decide to not abort our son, Luke,” Emily says.

CHOOSING LIFE

Emily and Craig’s first child, Luke.

Emily told her older sister, who in turn helped Emily tell her dad about her pregnancy. She, however, tried to hide her pregnancy from her mom for a few months, afraid of how her mom would respond to the news. 

“I ended up telling her, and she gave me a giant hug and said, ‘Please do not do anything permanent,’” Emily recalls. “She said she had an abortion. My mom has a lot of mental health issues, and she attributes her issues to having had an abortion.”

Emily faced societal pressure to abort her child. She had friends who told her, “Just go ahead. You can get rid of it.” But even with the pressure she faced, she felt God tugging at her heart, encouraging her to choose life and that she had the strength to do so.

“We have a society that encourages people not to take responsibility for actions and take what supposedly is an easy way out, and that’s kind of what we thought back then,” Emily says.

LOVE AND SUPPORT

Emily with her son, Luke, who was the best man at her wedding.

Emily’s dad encouraged Craig to attend college, and their parents offered to help care for their grandchild. Over the next four years, Craig went to college four hours away, coming home every weekend that he was able.

“Craig never encouraged me to get an abortion,” Emily says. “In our relationship, we’re very good at working together and coming up with solutions.”

By March of her sophomore year, Emily gave birth to her son and spent the next few months tackling one obstacle to another. Emily’s family had to relocate to a hotel shortly after Luke’s birth due to a house fire. This left her family scrambling to find a place to rent for a few months while their house was getting restored.

Emily placed her son in daycare so she could attend a vocational school during her junior year of high school. With her parent’s support, Emily was able to finish high school a few months early.

“I know not everybody has the support we had, but we didn’t know the support we would have when we chose to keep our son,” Emily says.

In 2017, Emily and Craig got married. Their son, Luke, was their best man. It was a surreal moment for them to have their son be a part of such a joyful and beautiful occasion.

“I wouldn’t say I suffered in any way because I was a teen mom. I don’t look back at those years and feel that it was an awful experience,” Emily says. “I feel like I was lucky that this happened. I got my husband out of it. We have had so many ups and downs, but we always come out of the bad times stronger. We have a great relationship. He’s my best friend! I am beyond grateful to my parents and Craig’s for the support we had when we were young parents.”

Emily and Craig with their three children.

Emily and Craig have now been together for 23 years and have three children: Luke (22), Mary (4) and Nola (3). They are also parents to two babies that they lost to a natural pregnancy loss.

“Not one of my five was any less worthy of my desire, protection and love based on the circumstances of their creation,” Emily says.

EMBRACING THE UNPLANNED

Emily with her son, Luke.

Emily previously managed a restaurant as a stepping stone for her HR career, but decided to leave her job to prioritize her family. She now balances motherhood and a career by working the night shift at a local library. 

“Maybe big milestones in life will be delayed. You might get into a career a little bit later than you would have, but having things take more time shouldn’t be a burden,” Emily says.

Even though Emily faced an unplanned teen pregnancy, she has learned to embrace the unexpected circumstances in her life, believing that everything happens for a reason.

“We can’t plan our life,” Emily says. “If we plan every aspect of our life, I think life will really push back at us. We have to go with the flow and understand that things might not go as we think they’re going to.”

Emily sometimes faces backlash from sharing her pro-life unplanned pregnancy story. But she believes that sharing her experience counters mainstream society’s narrative on abortion.

“It’s so crazy how you can share your story, and those people will shout back at you. But it’s like, hey, I’m just trying to share something positive here. Because this goes against the narrative you prefer, you’re threatened by a positive story,” Emily says. “Society wants to talk like [abortion] is mercy and love for women, and I just don’t see how telling women this is the best way out is showing women that they’re strong. No, I really feel like women are stronger than this narrative. But I do also feel that there is a lack of support out there. More help is needed. I truly believe that God will never set us on a path we aren’t meant to come out of stronger or more resilient.”