Everyone told her to get an abortion.

Her mom, her sister and her boyfriend didn’t want her to keep the baby.

But after going through an abortion during her first unplanned pregnancy, Stephanie Maldonaldo decided to fight back and protect the life of her second child.

‘I knew I did want that baby … but he was taken from me’

At 17 years old, Stephanie found herself pregnant and experienced a roller coaster of emotions. She didn’t know if she was happy or sad. She didn’t know who to turn to or where to ask for help.

Stephanie hesitated to tell her mom about her pregnancy but eventually told the truth. Instead of finding compassion and support, her mom and older sister immediately told her that she needed to get an abortion. Stephanie’s family didn’t want anyone to know about her pregnancy, afraid of the shame that it might bring on their family’s reputation. They didn’t even ask Stephanie how she was feeling or what she wanted. 

Stephanie felt like she didn’t have a choice. Everyone around her, including her baby’s dad, pushed her to terminate her pregnancy.

On January 23, 1997, Stephanie lost her 11-week-old baby to abortion.

“I think about him,” Stephanie says, “and I know exactly when the procedure was, where I was, what time it was, how I felt immediately after getting off the table. It was just pure death for me. I just felt like I died.”

After the procedure, Stephanie couldn’t trust anyone, including her family. The abortion wrecked her mentally and emotionally.

“I knew I did want that baby, and he would have been 26 years old right now,” Stephanie says. “I knew I was having a boy already and knew his name was going to be Romeo, but he was taken from me.”

Stephanie was overwhelmed by loss, sadness and loneliness for months. In her grief, she became silent and isolated.

“I could not speak, even as much as I wanted to scream,” Stephanie says. “Why did you take him away from me? Why did you take my baby away? What if Romeo would have saved my life? What if Romeo would have helped me grow into a better person at a younger age? What if he was meant to come into my life for a purpose? But I didn’t realize that all these years up until now — we all have a purpose.”

Fighting for life

In September 1997, Stephanie became pregnant again. She knew that her family and boyfriend would not support her keeping the baby. She knew that they would tell her to get an abortion, the same way they did during her first unplanned pregnancy.

“Nobody’s going to take this baby away from me,” Stephanie told herself. 

So she decided to fight for life for her baby. She hid her pregnancy during her first trimester and went through her pregnancy alone. Her family tried to be supportive when she was nine months pregnant, but she couldn’t trust them after what happened with her first baby.

On May 7, 1998, at 18 years old, Stephanie gave birth to a baby girl.

“She was beautiful. She was like a porcelain doll. I thought, I made her and she’s mine,” Stephanie says. “No one is going to be able to take this child away because now she’s here, and it was the most amazing feeling I can ever experience.”

Transformation through Jesus

Stephanie ended up marrying her boyfriend and had three children with him. Despite being married for 21 years, she felt alone in her marriage and in raising her kids. She was the leader of their family, juggling different responsibilities while working hard to provide for her children. On top of all that, she was still carrying the trauma of her abortion.

“There is a lot of regret. I felt like I was always pretending to be happy, but I really wasn’t happy because I knew what was done. I knew that I could have had a fourth child,” Stephanie says. “What would life be with him? Because I was now living life without him, but I was still carrying that burden. Why didn’t they fight? Why didn’t I say no? Why didn’t they say anything to keep him? Why didn’t I stick up for him? Why didn’t I protect him? He couldn’t do anything for himself because he was just a little fetus.”

About four years ago, Stephanie and her ex-husband divorced. Her life went downhill, and her children watched her go through a lot of brokenness.

Stephanie met the dad of her youngest child after the divorce, and the birth of her youngest daughter stirred her to get her life back on track.

“Since her dad’s not in the picture, I’m going to do what I need to do to make sure that this little girl has the best life, that she knows that she’s loved, that she knows that she’s wanted, that she knows that regardless of who is around her that mom’s there for her,” Stephanie says. 

By November 2021, Stephanie and her four children started attending Passion Church in Arizona. Her faith started to transform her life for the better and helped her be the best mom she can be for her kids.

“My goal is to uplift them as much as possible. My goal is to feed them with positivity, and that’s all because of God. It’s all because of faith. My faith is the primary reason why I try so hard to be that mom for them,” Stephanie says.

Finding forgiveness and healing

Stephanie’s faith seeped into every area of her life, including the abortion trauma she carried for over 30 years. She attended a women’s retreat with Passion Church in September 2022 where she heard an attendee share her experience with abortion.

“It was as if I was speaking her story,” Stephanie remembers. “And when she said that one of the sisters told her that her baby forgave her, that’s when that burden broke me. Then I realized that I was forgiven for that.”

Finding that forgiveness comforted Stephanie after decades of dealing with regret.

“It felt like a breath of fresh air. I literally felt the weight fall off my shoulders, fall off my chest, fall off the back of my neck. I felt like I could finally breathe,” Stephanie says.

Stephanie wants to encourage women who are going through unplanned pregnancies that there is always hope. She says it’s not helpful to carry that burden alone, so seek help and don’t be embarrassed about the story you have.

“Unplanned pregnancies are just that — unplanned,” Stephanie says. “But if you seek God, He’s going to get you through it and so never fear. You’re going to be OK. You’re going to have a beautiful baby, and that baby is going to change you and your life.”